


Animal I Have Become [SongFic]

by OmegaDirewolf



Series: SPN/TVD [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, Fear, Love Can't Save You Now, Mark of Cain, Songfic, The First Blade, Three Days Grace, Uncontrollable, animal - Freeform, im sorry for this, the bunker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-28
Updated: 2014-11-28
Packaged: 2018-02-27 08:33:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2686208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OmegaDirewolf/pseuds/OmegaDirewolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tags kinda say it all...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Animal I Have Become [SongFic]

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first SongFic so please, forgive me if it's horrible..

Dean lay, curled up in the fetal position on your old bed. Empty bottles of beer, whiskey, scotch, tequila and even vodka, surrounded him as he sniffled and cried.  
It's been two weeks since you left, and Dean felt that he could never forgive himself for what he did to you.

_I can't escape this hell_  
_So many times I've tried_  
_But I'm still caged inside_  
_Somebody get me through this nightmare_  
_I can't control myself_

The memories of your pained cry and fearful expression filled his mind, causing him to cry harder.  
It started with Sam and Dean's argument about the blade. You stood idly by as Dean yelled in Sam's face about this being a dictatorship and not a democracy.  
Dean was crazy about that blade, and honestly, it scared you. Usually it took a lot to scare you, being a hunter and having been raised by your father and five older brothers after your mom passed away, but this was different.  
This was the savage side of the man you loved. Though now, your love for him was hanging by a thread.

_So what if you can see_  
_The darkest side of me?_  
_No one will ever change this animal I have become_  
_Help me believe_  
_It's not the real me_  
_Somebody help me tame this animal_  
_(This animal, this animal)_

When Gadreel had appeared in the bunker to make peace, Dean attacked him, you all tried to hold him back, and it happened.  
You and Sam held Dean back as Castiel went to aid Gadreel.  
"Dean, let it go! Let it go," Sam continued to repeat to his brother.  
But Dean wouldn't have it.

_I can't escape myself_  
_(I can't escape myself)_  
_So many times i've lied_  
_(So many times i've lied)_  
_But there's still rage inside_  
_Somebody get me through this nightmare_  
_I can't control myself_

He knocked Sam, forehead to forehead. Watching Sam disorient a bit, Dean took his chance to push him back.  
Sam fell back on the table near by, banging his head and groaning in pain.  
"Dean!" you shouted as you tried to rip the blade from his grasp.  
Bad move.

_So what if you can see_  
_The darkest side of me?_  
_No one will ever change this animal I have become_

He attacked you. Next thing you knew, he grabbed a handful of your (H/L) (H/C) hair and knocked your feet from under you.  
Everything slowed at what happened next.  
A shrill scream escaped your lips as Dean drove the blade into your stomach.

_Help me believe_  
_It's not the real me_  
_Somebody help me tame this animal I have become_  
_Help me believe_  
_It's not the real me_  
_Somebody help me tame this animal_

His face had been contorted into a snarl until he met your (E/C) wet eyes.  
"(Y/N)?" he whimpered. He looked down and gasped as he saw his hand grabbing the hilt of the blade that protruded from you.  
You gulped hard and placed a bloody hand on his cheek. Tears streaming down your own.

_Somebody help me through this nightmare_  
_I can't control myself_  
_Somebody wake me from this nightmare_  
_I can't escape this hell_

Sam, Cas, and Gadreel stared in complete and utter shock at the sight before them. Sam snapped out of his trance and quickly ran to pull Dean from upon you.  
Dean got up without struggling, leaving the blade inside you, his hands shaking. His eyes brimmed and tears and spilled.  
"(Y/n)?" Sam asked softly, lifting your head a bit.  
You heard Dean whimper at what you said next.  
"He's an animal," you whispered.

_(This animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal, this animal)_

You looked up at Sam with wet eyes and you saw tears begin to form in his. You raised a bloody hand to his cheek and lightly smiled. "It's alright, Sammy," you whispered.  
"Cas," Sam called. "Heal her."  
"No," you quickly said.  
"What?" asked Sam, Cas and a crying Dean.  
"(Y/n), what are you talking about?"  
"I want to die, Sammy," you responded softly.  
"What?! No!" Dean staggered forward and knelt beside you and Sam.  
You looked to him and felt somewhat of a twinge of guilt in your heart. "You already had your saying in this Dean." You felt really bad after saying that but he deserved it.  
You couldn't live like this anymore! If you thought life before the mark was hard, you ought to bitch slap your old self in the face. You don't want to stand by and watch as the man you loved changed more and more everyday. You did want to watch him become less and less human by the minute with that blade.

_So what if you can see the darkest side of me?_  
_No one will ever change this animal I have become_  
_Help me believe it's not the real me_

"(Y/n), please," choked a sobbing Dean.  
"No," you whispered. And with a hard gulp and a cough up of blood, your eyes closed and never opened again.  
Since then, Dean only touched the blade if he had to. Which wasn't very often. But every time he did, the memories came rushing back, and he got the job done fast just to be able to set it down. That was when he realized he really was an animal during the time you were alive. That he was monster, and he killed the only light his world ever had. **YOU.**

_Somebody help me tame this animal I have become_  
_Help me believe it's not the real me_  
_Somebody help me tame this animal_

So Dean Winchester cried, because of the animal he had become.

_(This animal I have become)_


End file.
